I'm having one of *THOSE* days....

Do you ever have one of those days when you think that you so totally suck at what you're doing?

Yeah, it's one of those days... I think those of us in the creative world are maybe a bit more prone to this kind of despondency than, say, a plumber. I mean, you plumb a house and if it doesn't leak, you know you did a good job. The rewards are a little more immediate and concrete than for a creative person.

I spent some more time reading through the last few chapters of my book. Second draft is now basically done, and I'm thinking it really sucks. I know it doesn't. In my head, the characters are real, living, breathing, functioning people with stories to tell and lives to live. The world I've created speaks to me, desperate to be given a voice for this world. But when I read it, it seems flat. Dull. Uninteresting.

I fear that, in the interest of making myself more palatable to a future publisher, I'm reining my story in -- trying to keep it short, keep it moving fast, keep it centered on dialogue and action. While these are good things, this is fantasy, and in the process of making it move faster I'm skimming over some of the richness of the world.

I think of J. K. Rowling and her masterful use of Quidditch. It's so brilliant to create an entirely new game that gives her an opportunity to advance the plot and her hero an opportunity to shine. What's my Quidditch?

I think of Terry Goodkind and the way he uses magic -- the rules that aren't too complicated, but the variety and depth of it that astound me. The rules of my world I've figured out -- how do I share the variety and depth without plodding through it?

I need some time to let the novel breathe. Like a good wine, it will become better on the taste buds if it mellows a bit. In the meantime, I'm going to the library. I need a good fantasy fix. Or maybe I'll kill some time writing a quick short story -- something to let my brain play with while the internal editor sits and stews with her red pencil up her keister for a few days.

Stay tuned...